Since I’m now in my last year of my forties, I’ve decided to just go balls out with how I feel about people. And damn, does it feel good. So today, I dedicate this post to a topic that’s near and dear to my heart….phony b*tches.
Go F**k Yourself to the phony b*tch who always seems so nice when I see her in person but then shows her true colors with her passive aggressive political comments on Facebook. Wait, that does sound a little like me, but I swear I’m talking about someone else.
A big I SEE YOU goes out to the phony b*tch who purposely avoids making eye contact because she clearly doesn’t want to say hello. Listen up, if you keep looking in another direction you will not suddenly turn invisible. Suck it up and say good morning b*tch!
To the woman in the nail salon who I’ve met about a dozen times at a mutual friend’s house but doesn’t seem to recognize me even though I’m sitting right next to her. Hello b*tch, it’s been a long time. Let’s catch up. Then again, let’s not.
A big Go F**k yourself goes out to the distracted b*tch who really doesn’t care to have a conversation and is already looking over your head to see if there are more important people in the room she should be talking too.
If you happen to see yourself in any of these scenarios, don’t worry, I really wasn’t targeting you. Being a phony b*tch can happen to the best of us. Just try to catch yourself next time you try to avoid people you really don’t care for. My solution is to just stay home and binge watch a Netflix series or make plans with people I actually like.