Dear Single Mom Walking:
It has been a long time since I’ve had sex. I recently met a guy that I’m definitely attracted to physically, but that is all. Is it okay to sleep with him but not actually date him?
One Night Only is All I Have to Give
Dear One Night Only:
Yes. That’s it, just “yes.” This might be the shortest answer I have ever written for a question but there really isn’t much else to say. Believe me. I’ve been through those droughts and they are not pretty. I’ve had friends recommend various forms of self – stimulation, many of which I tried but eventually gave up on because 1. They will never hug you, ever, no matter how many times you ask and 2) when I inquired as to whether or not they loved me, all I got was the silent treatment.
Which leads me to say:
FYI to all the women out there “getting some,” when your friend is not getting any, hasn’t gotten any and it looks like she may never ever get any again. Please do not suggest she buy herself a vibrator because…
1. Trust me when I say that is the most un-original idea you could possibly think of and
2. Chances are she has one and it’s not her first nor even her fourth so if you really want to help her out, for God’s sake, the least you can do is buy her 5 flats of “C” sized batteries because with friends like you, it looks like she’s going to need them.
As usual, I would be remiss not to warn you to make sure he puts a glove on it. Now he might fight you on this and say he doesn’t need it but remind him that he’s not about to screw a pillow, you’re a human being and you have every right to protect yourself. If he persists, whip out a copy of my daughter’s tuition bill (which I’d be happy to send you) as well as all the costs associated with keeping her fed, clothed and entertained and if he still refuses, then grab your vibrator out of your drawer and tell him, “he’d wear one if I asked him to and he comes in purple, blue and if I wanted, all kinds of glittery.”
Believe me, the guy will leave so fast it will make your head spin. Unfortunately, it will most likely be because he thinks you’re a freak but who cares.
You need to take care of you, so you have to wait another day, so what? Sure, I know what it feels like to be so horny that shaking a man’s hand can becomes your version of foreplay, but you need to hang in there.
However, when you do find the right guy, go for it. You might want to let him in on it. Fair is fair. I mean men have a feeling too you know. Otherwise, go for it. Have a great time. Mazel Tov, enjoy, oh and Happy Passover.
Jessica Bern is a single mother to a 7yr old girl, a money sucking dog named Teddy and the ex wife of a man who left her for his mother. She writes at bernthis.com, where you she blogs all about it and where you can watch the Bernthis web series she created about a neurotic woman’s journey through her weekly visits to her therapist’s office. She also spends some of her time giving out sex/dating advice over at rolemommy.com and has worked her vlogging magic with aiminglow.com, Kodak and Seventh Generation.
For more from Jessica Bern, visit her blog, Bern This.
Dear Single Mom Walking: