I’ve been doing a lot of self reflection these days. Especially since I’m entering the last year of my thirties and I’m thinking long and hard about the choices I’ve made on my path to career success. When I was growing up, I can definitely say that becoming a publicist was not my dream in life. In fact, my one real dream was to perform on Broadway.
From the time I was two years old, I’ve been singing. From my ABC’s, to the theme from “Green Acres” to Helen Reddy songs to Barry Manilow, I spent most of my childhood in front of my mirror, singing into my hairbrush. While my parents entered me in pageants at our Poconos summer home, I had a few fleeting moments in the spotlight, prancing down the runway in a tiger print bikini and Mary Janes, where I wowed the crowd while singing my three year old heart out.
By the time I was nine, my parents knew I was serious about singing and so, they enrolled me in private voice lessons with Gina Joyce. Gina was a tough coach – taught me all about breathing and stage presence and even convinced me to take dance lessons so that I could carry myself more professionally on stage. The best part about singing with Gina was that I got the chance to appear in her recitals, singing show-stopping medleys from “Annie Get Your Gun,” “Oklahoma,” and “Funny Lady.” Every time I walked onto that stage to belt out those showtunes, I knew that was exactly where I’d always want to be.
At 10, we took a trip to Israel and one of the most vivid memories I’ve ever had was standing by myself on the stage of an amphitheater in Caesaria singing “Sadie, Sadie” from “Funny Girl.” Our tour group was quite impressed that I could pull off a Streisand number and even Carole King’s parents told me to keep going for my dream.
And so I did. All through junior high school and high school, I performed. In shows, in the band, wherever there was a stage – that’s where you’d find me. And I loved it. When I was a teen, I truly believed that anything was possible. And that’s when rejection reared it’s ugly ahead.
Following high school, I began to face the cold hearted truth that there were other singers and actors who were better than me. And after being rejected a few too many times than I care to count, I gave up on my dream.
And so, now at 39, I’m thinking long and hard about what I wanted to be when I grew up and I can readily admit, this isn’t it. I am happiest when I am singing and writing and while I may never get the chance to perform on Broadway in my lifetime, I know I’ve got to do what I love or else I will never truly feel fulfilled. I’m even starting to think that perhaps I should channel my energies and write a musical – and while it may take a year or two to get off the ground, I will be pursuing my very own passion project and perhaps when it does come to fruition, I’ll truly experience my shining moment.
Do you have a shining moment or a passion project you’ve always wanted to pursue? Share your story – I’d love to hear it.
Role Mommy 3.0