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The Cat Whisperer

IMG_0283.jpgMy cat Rudy has been a part of our family for more than 14 years. He's a loyal animal who loves nothing more than to curl up on my bed at night and pounce on my bladder in the morning when he is ready for his morning Fancy Feast fix. While he sleeps most of the day away, you know Rudy is hungry when he hops up on my kitchen table and sits beside my laptop hoping I'll read his cat language, get up out of my seat and crack open a can of grilled beef. Yummy.

But here's the problem - it's not dinner time and I don't feel like feeding Rudy just yet. Instead, I think it's time he starts pulling his weight around here and so I've decided to put him to work and contribute a column to Role Mommy. And while he can't speak, I've interpreted his cat cues and while I'm no Cesar Milan, I know exactly what Rudy is trying to tell me:

Rudy: Sits on my lap or cuddles up with me as I sit on the couch watching "American Idol"
What he's Telling Me: I just love hanging out with you and watching those cheesy contestants get eliminated. Don't you think the guy who looks like Owen Wilson in "Meet the Parents" needs to get a haircut? My hair is shorter than his!

Rudy: Sits on my kitchen counter and starts rubbing his head against my laptop screen.
What he's Telling Me: Would you just pet me already? I honestly believe that you love that computer more than me. Sheesh.

Rudy: Sits on my bladder at 5 am.
What he's Telling Me: Rise and shine. It's time to fix me some Fancy Feast! I'll take the grilled salmon with a side of liver kibble thank you very much.

Rudy: Greets me at the front door after we've been away for a week.
What he's Telling Me: Where the heck have you been? I've been moping around here for seven days. Oh and I left you a present upstairs since you didn't buy me anything. It's a petrified hairball if you'd like to know.

Rudy: Swats my hand after I accidentally pet him and he gets an electric shock.
What he's Telling Me: All I'm looking for is a little love and you shock me? What am I in prison or something?

Rudy: Scratches the arms of the couch until I shoo him away.
What he's Telling Me: Either you get off your fat butt and feed me or I will continue to wreck your furniture. Honestly, would it kill you to buy me a cat condo?

If you have a pet then feel free to share a photo and tell us all about what they're telling you. You don't have to be a pet expert to interpret the cues. Just ask Rudy - he knows I know exactly what he wants - it just depends who has more willpower.

Posted in: Blog, Role Mommy Confessions on 02/26/2010

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